May 20, 2021
Today was a BIG day! I’m not exaggerating. It wasn’t supposed to be a “big” day - the only thing on the agenda was my additional ultrasound (and possible biopsy) this afternoon, to look at the spot that was found during my MRI earlier this week.
But this morning, I wanted to touch base with Michelle - after having some time to process and think about the information she shared with me yesterday, I had some questions. Going out of state for the retrieval could mean unplanned expenses, the procedure might not be considered “in-network” anymore and we were not prepared for the cost that could potentially be attached to that. Not to mention, going down to St. Louis for the retrieval - where would my eggs end up after that? Would we have to go down there for all of our future fertility appointments when we’re ready to try getting pregnant again? Would they be transported back in-state? I just had a lot of unknowns floating around in my mind.
IVF/Egg Retrieval Update:
But before I could even launch into all of that, Michelle cut me off, she sounded very excited and said that she had some news, an update for me. There would once again be a change in plans. Instead of heading down to St. Louis for retrieval on Saturday - we were accepted as a patient for Dr. John Jarrett - one of the most accredited and best practitioners in the business when it comes to fertility and IVF. The joy and relief that I felt in that moment was immeasurable. My sister and I had been talking about Dr. Jarrett the night before - wondering if it might be possible to work with him, but we both wrote it off because we knew how highly sought after he was and thought there was no way that he would be able to get me in before next week.
I had family that were patients of Dr. Jarrett and all agreed that, given the choice, he was the guy to work with. It was very evident to me that God was present in this situation and He was once again making a way, leading exactly where Cory and I need to be to receive the best care. I had to jump in the car for one last blood draw and ultrasound in Champaign - which meant one final visit with Michelle, my angel NPR through all of this - and then hurry back to Bloomington for a virtual consult with Dr. Jarrett. It was great to “meet” him - he seemed very empathetic to our situation and highly motivated to do everything he could to help us. After reviewing all of my recent lab work and ultrasound results, it was clear to him that the retrieval would need to be on Sunday morning to give my eggs every last bit of time that we could to develop and mature.
So that was the plan, we would head to Indy Saturday night to be there for an early morning retrieval appointment on Sunday. There were more phone calls with his team, paperwork to fill out and send back, logistics to manage in the afternoon - but the retrieval date and time is scheduled and it’s actually, finally happening!
2nd Ultrasound Appt:
But if you can believe it - it gets even BETTER. I had my ultrasound this afternoon to look at the additional spot found on the MRI. So, spoiler alert I guess - the spot did NOT appear suspicious to the doctor reviewing the ultrasound imaging.
During the ultrasound, every time the tech would *click* take a picture of whatever she was seeing on the machine, I felt my gut sink further and further down. I had convinced myself in that 30 minutes that there was more cancer. That it would postpone my treatment because we would need to wait to be able to get in for a biopsy, that the worst case scenario was what we were dealing with here.
When the tech was done she left and I got dressed and sat in a small chair in the corner of the room. The tech came back after a few minutes and said, “Doctor. took a look and said that he thinks it’s probably a small cyst that popped up. No need to do anything more at this time, we might ask you to come back in 6 mos. to check in on it.”
I was shocked, y’all. Like I thought, maybe I imagined the words that I just heard come out of her mouth. I told her thank you. I headed out of the imaging center and felt myself collapse against the wall outside. I couldn’t tell if I needed to cry, laugh, scream (granted - I have like 300x the amount of hormones pumping through my body right now so that probably doesn’t help the situation) but it was a cyst. It wasn’t more cancer or a different type of cancer. Thank you, God! Thank you, God.
I called Cory, we celebrated. I called my mom - I'm pretty sure I freaked her out for a second because I wasn’t super clear with why I was calling, I just blurted out, “It’s a cyst!” But we got it sorted out and then celebrated. I texted my oncologist, he responded excitedly and with encouragement.
Today was a BIG day. Today was a GOOD day. 2 battles were won today in the ultimate war that I’m facing, and I am energized! We’re going to preserve our chances at having another (or maybe even a few more) Yontz babies! The cancer is still localized to the one tumor - it’s grown since the initial imaging was done, but it’s still only the one. And we will be figuring out a chemotherapy start date probably (hopefully) sometime early next week.
God’s hand is in all of this. There is no way that I can look at this day, at the last few weeks, and not see God in every single interaction. Every small miracle brings peace in this fight. God provides. God protects. He defends, delivers, makes a way. Even in the darkness I can still see the light and it is leading me out of this mess. I am going to beat this. We are going to beat this. Thank you to my prayer warriors - I feel you surrounding and lifting me up.
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