April 28, 2021
The Cancer Center's breast health navigator Lisa finally called. My mom, Cory and I sat around the kitchen table with my phone on speaker as she answered our questions. We discussed next steps and took detailed notes. I told her that my primary care physician had selected a recommended care team and we shared their names with her. She planned to make some calls and get my appointments set with a surgeon, medical oncologist and radiation oncologist.
Next steps:
Meet with each member of my recommended care team
Determine staging, prognosis, treatment, timeline
Fill out paperwork with medical/family history and prep for appointments starting next week, Tues. (5/4) and Wed. (5/5)
Remain hopeful and keep a positive attitude
We knew we would need counseling/therapy and support through all of this so we made a care appointment with a leader of our church. We met with Doug - we talked, we processed, we grieved together. We left feeling encouraged and supported by our church family.
We talked about how I felt God making a way through all of this crap - marrying a man who has caregiver written on his heart and lives his life as the hands and feet of Jesus, bringing me this disease early in life so that Macy (hopefully) won’t remember mommy’s pain and struggle, being back with my C.O.nxt family where I feel supported and am provided certain flexibilities in my job that others might not - it is so apparent to me that if you look for them, there are silver linings everywhere.
God is making a way. When I’m angry, it’s not directed at Him, not right now anyway. As my friend Laura used to tell us in my women’s small group, “There is a real enemy in this world, and it comes to steal, kill and destroy.” This cancer is not of my God, but I know He is going to get me, all of us, through this.
We had to tell more people today. It still sucked. I hate dropping this bomb into people’s lives, I know I need the support that our friends and family are so willing and ready to give - I just hate that I need it, I hate that this is why I’m calling on them.
Mom stayed another night. We cooked dinner together. Macy continued to bring light and joy to a bleak situation.
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